Every child wants to grow up. I was one of those children who always thought being older was one of the best privileges. No, I'm not going to go on with this post saying I want my childhood back, but I do miss the times where I didn't worry so much about planning out my life, and feeling all this random stress and emotion.
Most of my friends know I'm a pretty carefree person. I take care of tasks as they come, and I never look too heavily on things, except one: BOYS. I don't know how, but that seems the one thing I really stress myself over. OK, yeah they give me attention I want etc etc but its just annoying, that I kind of in a sense depend on guys to keep me going. Like no matter how much I know I shouldn't be committed to someone, I'm always actively in search for a love life. I am my best person when I'm single and not worrying a thing about boys, but boys seem to always be my interest at all times, and I hate it.
Going on, the more I think about this, the more I want to act upon it. For the past few days, I've been really thinking about taking a gap semester. I would stay in Singapore for the time being, work, and travel all over south east Asia myself. I think this idea really appeals to me because for a large majority of my life, I've always wanted to live on my own schedule, instead of working with my school schedule. I genuinely feel as if its a really good step for me to grow as a person. To be able to learn from different cultures, and be able to sustain myself in the world. I've been trying to bring this up to my mom, but currently she's not open with it and I really wish she was. Like no worries about school, just time to focus on things I like to do. Enhance my skills, and continue learning about myself and the world. As much as I might miss out on things in the states, I feel as if this may be the prime time to really explore, and delve into living alone and seeing things for myself.
But I don't know, just thought right now.
See ya later, Tummies!
xoxo
Tammy
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